Balance

I often say that I am trying to find a balance to my life and that I strive to be able to enjoy my everyday life. Unfortunately I don’t believe that people can slow down until they are shaken, a wake-up call if you will. I don’t wish upon anyone some of my experiences, but I don’t regret them to be able to recognize the value of the positive from negative. I came home this summer and wasn’t all that excited to be home, I was too focused on myself and working. I was abruptly put back in my place by one of my best friends. I don’t use the title of best friend lightly, I’m just not a huge fan of titles, and it often creates unattainable expectations. With that said, I believe a best friend is someone you can tell anything to and get an honest answer and be told the ugly truth when needed. Although she didn’t want to be so blunt, I sat down with her late one of my first nights home and she told me she had to tell me some very bad news that would change some things. This is one of those core-shaking moments, and I attempted to handle it as composed as I could and quickly went into problem-solving mode and tried to ease the situation. This was not a moment I could snap my fingers and make it go away, knowing my difficulty with emotions, she simply said, “you have already done more than you even know, just by being here for me”. Amazing, after a horrible year of dealing with a traumatic family issue she just basically said its all good, she just needed someone to talk to. This would be the moment I broke down crying and she ended up consoling me, great friends I am. The point to this overly personal story is, I needed her to say to me “you have no idea how lucky you are”, she’s right, I am so anxious and crazed about my next move that I completely forget to appreciate everything around me. So this is one of those moments, where I had to stop, take a step back and appreciate. There is nothing worth more in life than love, love from your friends, family and the people you surround yourself with. This is going to be the year of love and happiness, and that is what my best friend taught me. Its an interesting tone to start my summer off on, but I think its important.

Bicoastal Delay

Being home has been nice, no complaints about the amazing weather, but I am honestly having a difficult time with my friends. I just feel like because I live so far, that I am behind in everything. I definitely take part of the responsibility for not staying connected as well as I should have, but I can’t help feeling disappointed. There is a major disconnect with so many people that I felt so close to only a year ago. I never expected to stay connected to everyone and I know that people are busy with their own lives, but what did I miss? There are so many day to day things that I will never be able to catch up on, which I knew would be an issue with me moving. I’m trying not to take it all personally, but for some reason I can’t help but to feel forgotten and hurt. When I lived in LA I always made plans for all my friends and invited them over, and when I'm not around, there's no where for them to just hang. I can honestly say I always tried to make everything still work after I left. I know I am not the only one feeling this way, it’s a normal part of these transitional years, unfortunately I have always thought of my friends as stability and very much like family. My usual reaction is to just throw myself into work and forget them all and move forward, but I am hoping that’s not what’s going to happen. I am hopeful that I will be pleasantly surprised and that some things can return to the way they were, otherwise I pretty much done putting any effort forth. I also understand and accept that things are always changing and that’s okay too. So should we hold our friends to certain standards or is it unfair? What should friends be held accountable for?

Another School Year Coming to An End...

When I was 14 years old, my school took me to Boston to visit colleges, many people thought it was ridiculous to take a bunch of 8th graders to look at schools, but ever since then I told myself I would live on the east coast when I turned 18. My parents wrote it off as a phase and that I would end up nearby, but I never forgot about it and despite everyones skepticism I moved anyways. I am having a hard time wrapping my mind around the idea that I have finished another school year. Two years ago at this time I was graduating and so nervous about my future and leaving everything I care about and moving to a city I barely knew alone. It has definitely had its ups and downs, but I feel like I have really grown as a person and learned so much about myself. This year I tried to enjoy myself more and stress less about the future, and although that is easier said than done, I am on my way to slowing down and enjoying my new life here in NYC. This summer will be important to reconnect with my family, friends and work on building connections at my internship. As much as I should relax and learn how to sit still, I just can't so I compromised with taking an internship near home so I had a reason to leave NYC and go to LA for a few months. A few days at the beach will be nice, I am a Malibu girl at the end of the day, I miss the sand! I have become more confident in my future, and taken some necessary steps to help ease my fears of what I want to do after school. This year I want to focus on a more well-rounded me, I want to make new friends, work less and try to visit my family more. I have set myself up with great opportunities and have worked very hard the last two years, but it means nothing without friends to share in my happiness. I am going to make a more conscience effort to work on my relationships and I think it will make NYC start to feel more like a home. I no longer feel intimidated by this amazing city, I've learned to channel that fear into motivation. The energy of the people on this little crazy island have pushed me to work harder and for that, I have learned more than I can ever ask for from this experience and I will continue to take things away from this journey. Even though it has been difficult I don't regret a minute of it, and I'm excited for next year. So I'm off to the west coast, where its warm and sunny, with zero humidity, New Yorkers be jealous.

Room Service Anyone?

For my roommate's birthday we decided to go to a fun thai restaurant in midtown. We walked into a packed restaurant with a huge chandelier in the center and black walls, chairs and tables. For a smaller restaurant they sure do fill this place to the brim. From the bar to the restaurant, this place was packed and for good reason, first off the food is fantastic and it's super cheap. We ordered a ton of appetizers and then a few main courses to share. Everything came out so quickly and each item looked better than the one before. We had such a great dinner and I can't wait to go back for some more Room Service.

All American Burger

After a week of amazing and decadent food in Paris, as bad as it might sound, I sort of just wanted a burger. So I decided to finally go try a New Yorker secret hangout, the Burger Joint. A small, old school burger shop hidden inside a hotel in midtown. If you don't know where it is, you will probably walk by it over and over, as I watched many tourist do. After walking through a curtain and waiting through the line I ordered my burger and fries and my friend snatched one of the few booths and as we waited for our food we decided to write on the walls covered in notes from people from around the world. When we finally got our burgers we were joined from some other people, and looking around at the size of the place, sharing tables seems to be the norm. The actual burger itself was good, no bells and whistles just a patty, cheese, lettuce and tomato. I don't think that the hype of the restaurant is worth it, but it does make for a fun scene. So I guess I'm still on the search for the best burger in New York.

Au Revoir Paris!

Unfortunately it's time to start wrapping this vacation up and for one of our last nights we went Bateaux Mouches. We thought that we would get decent food and lots of tourist while seeing all the sights all lit up at night. We ended up on the newest boat with a beautiful table and fantastic food. We listened to live music and drank champagne while cruising down the Seine, if that wasn't a great ending to the trip, for our last night we went to the Baccarat Cristal Room the next night before we left in the morning. Everyone knows about Baccarat crystal, but in Paris they have a museum for their world famous crystal and a small restaurant. This small restaurant is covered in their beautiful crystal in reds and greens, over-sized mirrors and brick walls. After an amazing week, its was time to head back to school and say bye to my parents. I had the best time in France seeing all the gorgeous architecture, learning about champagne and tasting all the delicious French cuisine. I wish I didn't have to leave, but I know this won't be my last time in the incredible country.

A Touristy Few Days in Paris

After a very long meal at Guy Savoy, it was time to walk it off, and where better to walk then through the streets of Paris. We walked along the Seine looking at all the artwork and stores and over the famous bridges and noticed the locks on some of them. I had to google this peculiar tradition and learned that people from around the world leave "lovelocks", locks with names or initials of couples. A long day of walking calls for one of my favorite parts of traveling, room service of course. It has become an important factor in my travels, who doesn't like being served in bed? The next day we went to my new favorite place, Versailles Palace, the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Although its vast size, not one small detail is out of place and everything is in perfect condition. Just looking at the gates I knew this was something special and then walked into the hall of mirrors and understood why its world famous. The enormous chandeliers, gold leaf molding, vibrant tapestries and walls of mirrors throughout the whole palace truly makes this a special place.